Wow it's early! Last night The Millers of Seward hit the hay about 7:45...we spent the next 45 minutes in our bed watching "Tinkerbell and the Never Beast" hoping Avriel would just doze off...yeah no...she was busy playing and jumping around...movie is over and finally get her to bed and we call it a night for real this time....back story moment...last week sinus headaches up the you know what and right as I set my head down Bam! Another....oh boy...I just said a quick prayer for healing so I can sleep...well needless to say Avriel cried in her sleep really quickly but enough to wake me...I'm a light sleeper...so now she is curled up by the door sawing logs...Joe is well Joe is still in the land of nod and I'm down here drinkiny Tension Tamer Tea like it's going out of style and I did pop Midol...hoping the caffeine will help get this headache gone...we have a very busy day today. So thought I would get a head start on paperwork for the shop..as a wife of a man whose passion is being played out everyday in what he loves..it tends to add more to a wife's plate... Something stopped me..my motivation is there to start on these invoices but it's not time....quiet is extremely precious to me...and yes we do only have one child but my hobby is my quiet time...some people sew, knit, scrap book etc..not me I just want peace...as we go through the day we do forget we are here because of someone..someone very important to our salvation and our ability to move forward and start each day with a clean slate..and that is God and Jesus...both gave..gave & gave for us...I do pray little prayers throughout the day but rarely during those quick moments am I fully attentive to listening...and I realize my headache is not to do me harm but is a window to force my mind to open...sinus headaches I cannot have music, TV or even bright lights they do for me follow the same as migraines...I can always tell they are sinus due to my pressure around much nose lol..I feel like a tea pot ready to scream..with the lack of noise and distraction I have my mind..and eventhough I sit here listening..I'm not hearing anything until I get the urge to Blog and before I mentioned blogging helps me work out my prayers and be able to listen..my blogs end up always being a complex prayer with lots of twists and turns as I am an outside processor..which obviously He knows😊 and in my thoughts and typing them out he knows what I'm praising and what I'm in need of...and here we go another twist off topic...I am soo unbelievably thankful for the ability to type...gosh my handwriting could never keep up with my mind...my handwriting is awful partly due to too much going on and I seriously would get hand cramps when writing an essay for school...I was definitely a hater when it came to "Please turn in a rough draft, handwritten" gosh those dreaded words..good thing I was in school during the Era of Word Processors and typing..my favorite words from a teacher was "please use so and so margins, this size font and be sure to double space" ah music to my ears...anyway back to where I was..good thing I don't say "quiz when you're finished" so my question is "How do you feel confident and comfortable with praying outloud?" I'm still quite nervous about it because I guess in a way for those well seasoned folks I feel my prayers are scattered...but having a conversation with a lady on Tuesday she is a well seasoned believer and still is uncomfortable with praying out loud as well...maybe We are this way because He made us this way...her and I are both "fixers" meaning we like to physically "fix" people we care about or in other words are "doers" with physical action...awhile back we had a moment of prayer just impromptu at one of our services and one lady I care about was just having a rough day...so instead of praying out loud I grabbed her and walked her to one of our prayer teams and I let the prayer team pray for her...I just stood there with my hand on her shoulder and shut my eyes and took each word into my soul and thus creating tears of desperation, sadness & for guidance...when I really need Him I'm up early or up really late...when the sky is black and the house is silent..this is our time..so as much as I feel headaches are in inconvenience they are merely a strong action on his part to get me to sit in silence, be at Peace, be Still and Listen to work out things I'm in need of, guidance I'm in search of and words of Praise. So my sinuses issues are in a way a blessing but as the Bible says "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13...always will be one of my many favorite verses. I can get through this pain because he will always have my back...there is no doubt or lack of trust in that.
Father, I offer thanks to you for encouraging me to sit in silence with you and take in all that you have to offer in my time of need. I praise you for understanding my entire being and I also praise you for making me the way you wanted...I'm confident in continuing to stay in your Grace and take a step every day into righteousness with you. I know you don't give us things we cannot handle...and I do know whenever we ask for patience you add a few more clothes to our never ending piles of laundry lol..as of this moment I feel filled up and my tension is disappearing...my shoulders are not weighed down anymore...you are power, you are Grace, you are forgiveness, you are kind, you are God...and as I'm praying to you the Lion and the Lamb song is humming in my head...Amen
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